As I have been struggling through what the outlook might be for my "Familial Drusen" or Macular Degeneration, as some may understand better, I have spent every six month appointment waiting in agony and fear of what they might find next. When will I find that there has been a hemorrhage or a huge change, will I have to have injections? ...or worse yet, begin to lose my independence?! As many of our close friends and family know, we have been proactive with my eyes, seeking all the information we can get our hands on, taking every supplement out there, cleansing my body of toxins and of all things training our dog REALLY well, just in case. I have found some moments of freedom and trust in the Lord, to only find myself once again wrapped in the "what-if's". Yesterday, I went to my next check-up. Totally at peace. What a blessing yesterday was! I am usually freaking out, thinking the worst....(I know, you all are thinking, "don't you mean...NOT trusting God?!") Yes. Exactly, not trusting God. Yesterday, I left it completely in His hands.
Over the past six months, a dear friend who shall remain nameless, has showed up at my door at the beginning of every month, with a bag full of an expensive vitamin regimen that I could not afford. What do you do with that??!! You waffle back and forth between absolute gratefulness, obligation and awkwardness. Today, I praise the Lord for His provision! For the insight He gave this lovely person! My doctor wants to know what these vitamins are....what is in them....where did I get them, etc. well, I really can't say on this blog, because that might make that person a lot less anonymous!
Last December, I was not able to be corrected to 20/20, yesterday, I WAS! Everything looked so good, my Doc didn't even order the $500 scans! Woohoo!! Praise the Lord! I don't know what this means for the future, but I know what it means for right now.....a burden lifted, renewed understanding of trust in my Lord, renewed joy in cutting flowers in my garden, being glad I can see the crinkle of a smile starting in your eyes, seeing how grateful you are for a simple cup of coffee on Sunday morning, loving the beauty of all those hearts beating in one room, for one Savior, loving that I can SEE the tear that drops on the desk in front of me today.
I know this may seem simple, but my loving Hubby bought me a shelf for my (early)birthday, so that I can set up a coffee/tea station in our kitchen, and the joy that it brings to pull together bits from around the house and garden to make it look like it belongs, to think of the friends who will choose their tea there and to love the days ahead when I can be free to love and care for those around me........THANKSGIVING DAY!!!!!!!
Some have asked where my email and blog name "Simply Scrumptious" came from.....well, remember the girl Simply Scrumptious from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang?? I named my cheesecakes Simply Scrumptious, when I really wanted to start a business.....but really, this is now my name for this life, in Christ, when every day is Thanksgiving Day!
P.S. I am adding this a little late, but what was on my mind as I wrote and never made it out....is the love and gratitude I feel for those who have labored in prayer for me! Those prayers are felt and effective! We have a good and Great God! I love you all and thank you!!!
I hope your day has been Simply Scrumptious!!
Psalm 37:4-6
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